


Ridiculously Lovesick

by sugarmoons



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drabble, Frustration, Hogwarts, Lovesick, M/M, because Draco won't send it, love letter, singular
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-09
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-10-13 13:11:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20583059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarmoons/pseuds/sugarmoons
Summary: Draco had a crush on the one and only Harry Potter. Except he can't confess verbally and he certainly can't get his thought written clearly on a page.





	Ridiculously Lovesick

Draco struggled to express his feelings, his pure blood upbringing resulted in him being a master of repressing his emotions. In an attempt to express his very apparent crush on the boy he was meant to hate, he was going to write a love letter. Filled with loving anecdotes and declarations of love.

Dear Potter

He scribbled it out ripping the paper with his fast growing frustration. Already this was heavy on his heart. Desperate feelings rising to the surface of his pale skin, bubbling in his gut. His brain was melting with every second he endured this newfound feeling. Never had he longed for something so much, never for something he could never have.

He pulled another sheet of clean parchment out of his bag. Before he picked up his quill he tried to force himself to relax. He slouched his rigid posture and let out the breath that was trapped within his throat. He doubted it was enough for him to write a coherent letter.

"It's just a letter," he reminded himself, speaking aloud in his empty dorm. "Just a letter" His face screwed up in embarrassment. What teenage boy was writing love letters that he didn't to send? What kind of teenage boy got this sexually frustrated over another boy? All this pent-up frustration over Harry potter. Saint Potter, golden boy extraordinaire Potter, Perfect-fucking-Potter.

Ridiculous.

Was Harry really worth getting worked up over? Did Harry mean that much to him? A crush. That's all it was. A silly, little, teenage crush. It had to be just a crush. Anything else would be catastrophic. Anything else would be like walking on the thinnest tight rope imaginable. He couldn't succumb to the whims of his heart. He couldn't let himself fall beneath the surface.

Harry was everything his parents were against. He was the embodiment of the dashing hero who defeated the evil villain. A half blood with a muggle born mother and muggle born friends. He wasn't what Draco was allowed. He wasn't pure blooded with a lineage that dated back centuries without taint. He hadn't been brought up with the same ideals. Harry Potter would be like throwing a spanner into perfectly working gears.

Draco imagined what it would feel like to have Harry on his bed. His hands running through the black mop that laid upon his handsome face. Their lips coming together in soft pecks before they properly kissed. Harry's tie loosely hanging from his neck, gently hitting Draco's chin when they pulled apart. Draco could imagine it all so vividly as if it was real. It wasn't. But he could dream. He could explore the dark corners of his mind, is deep desires that hid behind shadows and closed doors.

He groaned swinging back on his desk chair. Merlin he was a mess. A touch-starved, lovesick mess. Harry Potter was destroying from the inside out and he didn't even know it. Harry was like a parasite i Draco's mind feeding away at any normal thought.

_'I could go to bed - Harry could also be in bed.'_

_'I could study - what would it be like to study with Harry?"_

_'I could scream until someone realised I wasn't mentally sane and took me away from this school that Harry also happens to attend'_

If his friends were a little more suppotive he might have ranted to them. Pansy's ear would've fallen off and flown to China by the time Draco was finished. Harry was like a magic pot of unending conversation, well, thoughts. Even Snape pulled him aside last lesson to ask why he couldn't stop staring at the back of Harry's head. The back of his head wasn't even really attractive either, it's just hair. Messy, black hair. That Draco was desperate to run his fingers through.

_Dear Potter,_

_I'm dying to play with your hair. I'd also love your lips on mine._

_Yours truly, Draco (The guy you hate)_

He incinerated the parchment.

Potter probably wasn't the best way to address him either.

_Dear Harry,_

_I'm hopelessly in love with you. I daydream about going to Hogsmeade with you. I'd buy us butterbeer and afterwards we'd buy so many sweets they'd proably go off before we'd finished them. We don't even need to buy anything. I'd do anything for a meaningful conversation with you. One were we pour hearts out to each other, both of us listening whilst the other talks. You could rant for a full hour and I wouldn't complain. _

_Even if I sent this we couldn't be together. Whether that's because you don't return my loving sentiment or because my father is a tyrannical asshole. One day I'll send you a proper letter, one were I confess my love in romantic metaphors instead of rambling rubbish._

_Love, Draco Malfoy (Your "Arch Nemesis")_

He sealed the letter in an envelope, carefull writing Harry's initials on the front. It might never be sent but it was nice to write something out. To confess something even if it wasn't confessing at all. He shoved the letter under his pillow hoping to Merlin that Blaise didn't find it.

**Author's Note:**

> This was roughly written in Chemistry whilst I was supposed to be doing textbook work so it's a bit of a mess.


End file.
